So this is Christmas

Every family's is a little different. Some are better, some are worse, but most include lots of family and lots of food. Last night, my dad dressed up as Santa so that my cousin's son could sit on his lap and have his picture taken. Like any normal family (ha!), we then all had our pictures taken with Santa....although most of us knelt beside him for fear of breaking his lap. I asked for a million dollars....and I've been very good all year, so I can't wait until tomorrow morning.

Another family I know is all decending upon the home of their matriarch. She put it as "a stream of crazy will be arriving over the next 24 hours." I have to admit, all those people spread between a front house and back house sounds like a lot of togetherness for me. I like that my family is a short drive from each other and not all in the same fenced area.

On this eve of Christmas I am looking forward to being finished wrapping gifts, will eat way too much food and spend time with family members I don't get to see often. I hope you all have a wonderful holiday and provide me with lots of stories for next year's Christmas post :)

If you are going to do something - do it right

Seriously, if you are going to take the time to get a ladder, climb it, and hang lights, don't just throw them up on the side of the house. You could have done that without the ladder. My case in point was shown to me just the other night. I feel certain that this homeowner is not the only offender of this horrible crime, but they will serve as our example.

I mean, why border the window if you can't finish the area over the porch. Could the blue lights not go around the window? And what happened on the bushes? I think you literally just threw the lights at it. While I applaud your true laziness and straight man style of decorating, HUNDREDS of people drive past your house. This is really the best you have to show for yourself?

As you can see, poor holiday decorating drives me to have millions of questions about your mindset.

Office Etiquette

It has come to my attention that numerous people are driving their coworkers crazy. While I can't do much about this if it is a personality conflict, there are a few things that you can refrain from while at work to not make other people want to kill you.

1. Do not tell other people how to do their job if you are not their boss.
2. If you are nerdy enough to have an evil persona, don't advertise it.
3. Don't eat smelly foods if you work in a cubicle.
4. You should come to work ready to work, do not use the first hour as an opportunity to do your hair and make up.
5. Personal hygiene is important...be clean.
6. Do not continually and unnecessarily crack your knuckles.
7. If you feel like a germ factory, stay home - no one wants what you are sharing.
8. Listen Shady McGrady - everyone knows how shady you are so stop acting like you are above the drama.
9. Do not borrow a nail file, use it on your feet in someone else's office and then return it. I guarantee that the owner no longer wants that file.
10. It's called personal space for a reason....take 3 steps back.

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year

Ok, so I borrowed some song lyrics for this post's title. But I really do think that December is the most wonderful time of the year. We celebrate the birth of baby Jesus and me. We gather with lots of friends and family, we eat too much food, we buy gifts for those we love....and sometimes ourselves. It makes me sad though that all of this also comes with so much stress and exhaustion.

In the fantasy world where I spend all my time when I'm not at work, I am like Brittany in this week's episode of Glee. Well, not quite, but I really do feel like Christmas is supposed to be a wonderfully magic time of year. In moments of calm, I can feel this magic. Unfortunately, my moments of calm are few and far between.

For the next few weeks, between your 3rd and 4th glass of wine, take a moment to think about the joys of the season, how you love your family and friends and that this month only, it's totally ok to have a 5th cookie.

Oh How I Hate You

Pantyhose are just one of my many arch nemeses. What I really don't understand is why a product that starts at your feet and ends at your waist would have the primitive sizing structure of socks. Yes, they do cover your feet, but let me assure you that I have a lot of friends whose feet are the same size as mine, but our hips and waists are no where near the same size. Yes, they stretch, but come on, every fabric has it limits. And really? How insulting to women everywhere that clothes have a thousand sizes, but hose have only 3. They might as well be one size fits all.

Before you even mention it, I do realize I am one of a very small group of people under 50 who even wear pantyhose anymore. I promise you, the reason is not because they don't make your legs look better in the middle of winter, it is because no one can find a pair that properly fit. In order for you to fit perfectly into any pair you would need to be 7'9" and weigh 123 pounds. I am 5'2", mine come up to my chin.

Whack-a-Mole December

Do you ever feel like the holiday season is a month long game of whack-a-mole? This week has been horrible. I am at work by 6:00 am, leave late in the afternoon to rush off to AT LEAST two more functions. I'm exhausted and it's only December 3rd. I'm constantly rushing around, putting out the next fire, buying one more charity gift, fixing one more appetizer, buying Christmas gifts for family and politely declining an additional cookie. All these moles keep popping up and it takes every bit of my energy to keep hitting them with that weird mallet.

Christmas is by far, my favorite holiday. When did it become so stressful? We start the year at level one of the game and by December it's a marathon of pounding out activities and festivities, but how festive can you be when really you are just racing to the finish line for the year? No wonder we find ourselves yearning for a new year, a new start and a more relaxed life.

Happy Holiday festivities to each of you....be sure to carry a mallet.